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I Can't Keep Up With What's Been Going Down, I Guess My Heart Must Just Be...

Song Of The Day: Lawyers In Love / Jackson Brown
Word Of The Day: Batraquomancy / Divination using frogs

Lawyers In Love is one of those songs you love, but like some tight ass lawayer, you don't want to admit it when friends are around. Well, that's any Jackson Browne song (Tender Is The Night? I'm Alive?). But Lawyers In Love is a really good song, in my opinion. The video makes us feel weird that we like it. Who are 'WE'? Me and my wife. One day she's walking through my studio and I'm fucking cranking Lawyers In Love, and she sorta catches me, and it's difficult to pinpoint my awkward sense of shame, it's like she caught me wacking off, but my dick is harder, cuz it's the part in Lawyers In Love right after the bridge, where the organ and keyboards have done their modulating fucking MAGIC, and we are perched atop nothing less than the apex of this hot 'tator, and I spin around BELTING "NOW WE'VE GOT ALL THIS ROOM, WE'VE EVEN GOT THE MOON!!" to find my wife regarding me like a monkey tossing shit in its cage. "Oh, Hi sweetie. I was just... " and I'm all ready for her to go "You are such a..." but she's like "I LOVE that song. Did you know I love that song?" and I recover, BAM! like a 15 year old gymnast who's spent 12 years on the uneven bars, I STICK my dismount with a rock solid "WELL, WHO DOESN'T?! This song is awesome. Let's dance!" And dance we did my friends, close, and then closer, until our dance walked right up to Inappropriate and licked it on the nose, and just a bit inside the nostril. But Inappropriate has been around the block. It's one jaded bitch. Inappropriate was like "Is that all you GOT?" Bolstered by a big ass earful of "I hear the U.S.S.R will be open soon- as vacation land..." my wife and I looked sqaure at Inappropriate's saliva-glistened face, and we go "Uhhh... nope." In a way only married people can, we simul-dropped-trou and spilled two foul Jackson Brown-cakes on the rib-griddle of our foe. Skipping, giggling our way into the horizon, we bounced to the rhythm of OOO-LA LA LA LA's in the Lawyers In Love Intro, trading knowing winks in the innocence of our life long teen crush.

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The greatest lyricist I've ever heard.

-Ed Kowalczyk, Lead Singer of Live