word of the day: autopoiesis
song of the day: just what i needed (Cars)
wake up, meditate, start driving. i do a phone interview with the colorado daily (thanks wendy kale!) while i'm driving from minnesota to iowa, the phone hurts my face and gives me a weird pain in my jaw. i'm not sure what it is, maybe the heat from the battery, or the way it rests on my face, the radio waves... agh. it's hard to hear and everything you ever hated about a cell phone bubbles up, but we manage to conduct the interview. topics: dharmapalooza, KBCO studio C, changes at my record label, my next album, will i be released nationally by rykodisc?
bali satay house is killer. 140 people on a tuesday night, they're packed in standing room, etc, and it's a privelege to play for them. chad and i are relaxed, feeling lots of love, and the night is ideal. i leave the camera off again for this show, because what the hell, superstition is fun. with no camera on in mankato, things were magic. tonight again, no camera, and lots of magic. my body is relaxed, mind is quiet, spirit is bright. i'm noticing a trend that i'm hoping will permanently stabilize, an awareness is returning, a witnessing through much of the day and even during dreaming. i believe i've mentioned in earlier entries (or was that in my video journal) that i lost my witnessing in dreams and about 70% of my waking as well back about a year ago. it seems to be coming back after the semi-black out of the last year. my favorite songs of the night are probably eclipse, glass, and pump it up.
chad and i have dinner with matt, cori, liza, liza's boyfriend, and nika. nika is four, and completely adorable ( i think you can see pictures of her on stuartdavis.com soon). after the show we drive to omaha, it takes us four tries to get a hotel, and then it's a real dump and the guy charges me $77.00 because it's college something or other sports, everything's full. i conk out, wake up, literally roll out of bed onto the zafu. i realize it's been five days since i've worked out. today i ate thai soup, diet coke, water, sprees, and a power bar. i feel fat.
talking with my wife on the phone i discover she's been sick for a day with fever 102, and when i get home i probably will have to stay in the studio so i don't catch the flu from her and Ara. they've been throwing up, chills, the whole deal. i feel bad i won't be able to nurse her back to health, but if i get the flu we'll have to scrap the DVD, two shows, and dharmapalooza will fizzle. but if it happens, it happens. driving back i remember i have a choice, and i want to stay fully engaged and present, but not get lost in the stories, the stories, the stories. just stories.
